


DxRxTxBxSTxPxD

by UnderThisRedRock



Category: The Owl House (Cartoon)
Genre: Can I just type anything in these tags?, Characters Reading Fanfiction, Gen, Help I'm trapped in a fanfiction warehouse, Metafiction
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-03-14
Updated: 2021-03-14
Packaged: 2021-03-22 21:28:55
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,512
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/30045021
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/UnderThisRedRock/pseuds/UnderThisRedRock
Summary: In which Luz and Amity read fanfiction. Willow does crossfit. Chaos ensues.
Relationships: Amity Blight & Luz Noceda
Comments: 5
Kudos: 15





	DxRxTxBxSTxPxD

**Author's Note:**

> fiction reading fictional fiction
> 
> are we even real
> 
> the same old patterns emerge like well worn cloth
> 
> but its all in fun
> 
> so have fun

It was a bright sunny day on the Boiling Isles. Luz Noceda, human apprentice of the notorious Eda the Owl Lady, and Amity Blight, hopeless lesbian witch, were shoulder to shoulder on Luz’s bed, sharing her phone to read Good Witch Azura fanfiction.

“Ugh.” Amity rolled her eyes. “This sucks already.”

“No,” said Luz, “give it a chance! It hasn’t even started properly yet.”

“I hate when fanfiction recaps a bunch of information we already know. Who is reading this who doesn’t know who Azura and Hecate are?”

“It’s setting the scene. Or tone. Or something. It’s not a big deal, it’s just how fanfiction is.”

“I guess.”

Amity drummed her black-nailed fingers on the surface of the bed, waiting for Luz to scroll down.

“And another thing,” she said.

“What?” Luz asked.

“Azura doesn’t have a travelling cloak.”

Luz shrugged. “In this story she does, I guess.”

“But why?”

“Because the author wanted to give her one? I don’t know.”

Amity huffed with exasperation. “But it’s a big part of her design that she doesn’t have one! It sets her apart from other witches by not having a very basic object that’s part of everyday witch life. It shows how unprepared she is for all her adventures and is emblematic of how she approaches magic in an unorthodox fashion.” She hit Luz’s bed with a fist for emphasis.

“She could have just bought one at some point. It doesn’t need to be explained.”

“That’s not the point. Ugh.”

“Wow, you are grumpy today.”

“ _Ugh._ ”

The pair settled back into silence, their eyes scanning the text. They had met up today with the goal of doing homework together, finished early, and had somehow gotten on to the subject of fanfiction. Luz was faintly amused with Amity’s growing frustration with its recurring tropes.

“Okay,” Amity said suddenly, breaking the quiet, “this story is doing it too.”

“Doing what?”

“Doing that thing where it skips over telling the actual story. There’s nothing about where Azura and Hecate are actually going, they’re just talking.”

“Maybe,” Luz said with a cheeky grin, “the talking is the story.”

“But they’re not talking about anything! They’re just hanging out. The only difference between this and all those weird stories where all the characters have no magic and are working in a coffee shop is that there’s no coffee shop.”

“People like writing Azura and Hecate doing stuff together. Not everything has to be in the exact same tone as the books.”

Amity gestured into the air. “This is barely recognizable as Azura and Hecate. It could be anyone.” She folded her arms. “At least the author isn’t reducing them down to how one of them acted at a single point during all five books and is making that the entirety of their character.”

Luz smirked at Amity. “You’re cute when you get mad at stuff.”

Amity’s response was to turn a bright tomato red and mutter, “Just keep scrolling.”

Luz turned her attention back to her phone. In the story, Azura and Hecate continued to chatter about inconsequential things.

“Are they meant to be together, in this story?” Amity asked.

“Maybe. I guess not?” Luz cocked her head. “They would probably be more… couple-y, if they were.”

“It’s just that too many authors seem to take it for granted that they’re a couple already.”

“Well, Azurate is practically canon. You’d have to really try to ignore it actually happening.”

“Yes, but it hasn’t actually happened _yet_. There’s a world of difference between them being together and them almost being together.”

“You just want to read through another confession scene, you big shipper.”

“I just want authors to be a little more respectful of the canon!” Amity exclaimed, her cheeks reddening again.

Luz stifled a giggle. Amity really was cute when she was mad at stuff.

“For example,” Amity continued, taking a breath, “when is this story meant to take place?”

“During the day, it says right at the--”

“No, in the timeline of the books.”

“Oh. Uh.” Luz scanned briefly through the passage she had just read. “Well, it has to be after book four, because Azura and Hecate aren’t at each other’s throats. I guess some time after book five?”

“But there was a huge shift in the status quo at the end of book five! The Dark Czar is actively hunting after Azura, and so far he hasn’t been mentioned once.”

“Maybe this is meant to be before the confrontation at the Citadel.”

“But that doesn’t make sense, because Hecate already has the scar across her cheek,” Amity said, shuffling her bandaged leg back and forth. “It’s in this ambiguous nowhere-time that exists only in fanfiction, and it’s impossible to pin down exactly when anything is meant to be happening because so far all the author has done is have their characters talk about nothing and repeat things that happened already in the books in ways that are awkward and less funny.”

Amity’s tirade was cut short by Hooty unexpectedly barging through the window. “I eat carrion and detritus! Hoot hoot!” he exclaimed, and started retching.

“Get out of here, bird tube, or I’ll tie you in a knot!” Amity yelled, forcing the house demon’s telescoping protuberance back outside where he belonged.

“Listen, Amity,” Luz said, rubbing the back of her neck, “we don’t need to keep reading.”

“Hm?” Amity turned to face Luz. “Why?”

“Well, it just seems like you’re not really into it, is all.”

“No, I am, I am, it’s just…” She frowned. “I just want it to be _better_. Fanfiction’s got so much potential, but most of the stories never live up to it. It’s maybe one out of a hundred that are anything like the actual books, and one out of a hundred of _those_ that do something really interesting and go beyond what the books could ever do. I guess that’s what I’m hoping for when I read fanfiction. That sounds kinda dumb, huh?”

“No, it’s not dumb.” Luz took Amity’s hand in hers. “I’m hoping for that when I read too, but I also like the stuff that’s not as good, because people are having fun writing it! They’re just exploring the characters or the setting because they like it, or even just exploring writing itself. And if their work isn’t great to start off with, it doesn’t matter, because it’s just fanfiction, right? There’s no pressure for it to be amazing, it’s a safe environment to experiment in. And maybe a few of them experiment enough and become actual good writers.” Luz laughed. “I mean, when I started, I had no idea what I was doing! My old fanfiction is terrible.”

Amity’s eyes went wide. “You wrote fanfiction?”

“Uh, yeah.”

“Can I read it?”

“Never in a million years,” Luz said with a grin.

“I guess you have a point, though,” Amity said after a short pause. A sly smile crossed her face. “Hey, you know something?”

“What?”

She squeezed Luz’s hand. “You’re cute when you like stuff.”

Luz felt her cheeks grow warm. “So,” she said, “want to finish reading this story? There’s not much left.”

“Sure.”

They kept reading to the end, still hand in hand. Nothing extremely significant happened to Azura and Hecate, save some for minor ship-teasing.

“That was…” Amity searched for the right word. “Alright.”

“Just alright?” Luz asked.

“I guess it was fine.”

“Do you want to like it?” Luz’s finger hovered over a point on the screen.

“Huh?”

“Or give it a thumbs up, or a kudos, or whatever.” Seeing Amity’s confused expression, she explained, “It’s how you tell the author they did a good job.”

“I suppose.”

Luz tapped the screen. “Should we leave a comment?”

“I’ll think about it.” Amity touched a finger to her chin. “What sort of thing can we comment about?”

“Anything. What we liked, didn’t like. Ask the author a question.”

“Hm.” After a moment of thought, she said, “I do appreciate how, even though this story wasn’t being especially serious, it did try to make some kind of point.”

“Mm, I liked that too.”

“Because outright comedy is pretty hard to write, and most authors don’t do very well with it. Instead there’s a lot of random asides that you have to be deeply entrenched in the fandom to understand, those are just distracting.”

“Yeah, or characters being way out of character, or weird lampshading, just for a cheap laugh. Things like that. I’m glad this didn’t do that.”

“Me too.” Amity turned to Luz. “Want to read something else?”

-/-

Meanwhile, elsewhere, Willow paused in the middle of her daily one hundred sit-ups. “Is anyone there?” she asked the seemingly-empty courtyard, toned muscles that would normally be covered under her Hexside uniform coated in sweat.

Boscha, who hadn’t been watching Willow work out because she was into her or anything, crouched behind a tree and tried to remain as silent as possible.

And since he couldn’t reasonably be shipped with anyone and wasn’t of keen interest to the fandom, Gus did not appear once.


End file.
